Hazel at two: all sass

Putting Hazel on my lap, I say, “Oh, your diaper’s poopy. You told me your diaper wasn’t poopy, but it is.”

“It’s not poopy!”

“But I can smell it. You’re poopy.”

“No, I’m not poopy. I’m just wet.”

“Okay, let’s go change your wet diaper.”

“It’s not wet. It’s poopy.”

Hazel showed me one of Rose’s Barbies and said, “I like her! She’s cute! Is she a fish?”

I said, “Yeah, she’s a mermaid. She’s a mermaid Barbie.”

“No, she’s a fish.”

“You’re right,” I agreed. “She’s a fish girl. Fish girls are mermaids.”

Hazel pulled off the doll’s tail fin. “It’s a butterfly! So she can fly. She’s so cute! I like her! I’m cute. And you’re cute. And she’s cute too!” She showed me little decorative bumps that are all over the mermaid’s tail and bra. “These are his nipples.”

A few minutes later, I found the mermaid on the floor and asked to take a photo of Hazel holding it.

“No. I’m done with the mermaid. It’s Rose’s mermaid.”

“Oh. Are you eating a candy cane? Is that the candy cane Santa gave you?”

“No, Santa Claus gave me the candy cane.”

This entry was posted in My kids actually are funny (and sweet and wonderful). Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Hazel at two: all sass

  1. Jason says:

    Oh golly…the patience of Job.

  2. Jbug says:

    Wow! She’s so cute.

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