Maybe I should consider actually sleeping at night (I’ll have to take the issue up with Hazel)

At church today when a speaker was talking about emergency preparedness, he said, “The price of staples could suddenly triple,” and I honestly sat there thinking how easy it would be to acquire enough to keep a stapler fully loaded for a very long time. And wondering how he came to choose that rather strange and trivial example of a shortage.

Staples

My other exciting moment at church today was when Hazel’s mouth came in contact with my eye and left such a copious amount of spittle that when I wiped it off with a tissue, most of my mascara came off too.

slobber01

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This entry was posted in I think I'm funny, Parenting, Taking self-deprecation to a remedial level. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Maybe I should consider actually sleeping at night (I’ll have to take the issue up with Hazel)

  1. Lili says:

    hahaha, your illustrations should win some sort of award.

  2. Jen says:

    LOVE that photoshopping.

  3. Hannah says:

    hello droll. goodbye gums. hello teeth. goodbye breastfeeding.

  4. Hannah says:

    make that “drool”. maybe I should consider sleeping at night too. I’ll tell Ethan to hurry up and get his stupid molars.

  5. OhSusanna says:

    Again, I applaud your photoshopping skilz.

  6. I loved the staples quote because I was thinking of staples that hold your paper together too and totally not thinking of flour/sugar/rice staples. And I love the illustrations too, I have no idea how to do that.

  7. Acheté says:

    The goldfish makes it.

    And the easy button is a brilliant touch.

  8. American Yak says:

    Thank you for the diagram. It was very informative.

    (And yes, clearly you should be winning some prizes.)

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